What does it mean to be unique?

October 16, 2019

Cambridge Dictionary defines unique as "being the only existing one of its type or, more generally, unusual, or special in some way." I think that definition encapsulates what it means to be an individual in every way. I take pride in the most unusual parts of myself these days. I have come to accept that I really am not like those around me and that those around me really aren't too much like each other. 

 

I think that when we look at our physical selves or we look inside ourselves we will see things that we know not everyone else has. There will be commonalities between people but I think it is the combination of traits that we have that is unique. Two people might have brown hair but one might have brown eyes and another might have brown eyes. It is in the mixing of traits that we find something that is unlike anything else. The same can be said about our combination of personality traits and the paths we choose to take in our lives.

 

I came to this realisation when I had more than one personal interest and hobby in high school. When you look at all the teen movies (of which I watched many) you see all the groups. There are the sporty kids, the music kids, the smart kids and the dance kids. I legitimately thought that was what it was like. When I started year 7 I had no idea which one I was going to be. After a year of being there I realized I was the I was the music girl, the debating girl, the dancer and the academic all at once. I had extra-curricular activities on all the time. I would be arriving to school 30 minutes early for a private flute session and staying back to 7:30pm after school at a dance rehearsal. I would be at the local boy’s school on Monday nights competing in debating and spend the weekends studying because I still wanted to do well academically. The amount of pages I featured in the year book was actually ridiculous. I wore so many hats trying to work out which one suited me the best. The truth is I didn't need to conform to just one hat. I could have multiple hats. 

 

My uniqueness lied in the fact that I genuinely enjoyed (and still enjoy) lots of different things. I didn't limit myself to one group of friends. I could be who I wanted in all the little groups that I belonged to. For me, I felt really privileged to be in a school that offered so much. I wanted to meet new people and acquire new skills. Even though I think back now on a few of the random things I tried and wonder "what on earth was I thinking?" the reality is that it has shaped who I am now. 

 

I see this now even in my university studies, I have been the Law student, the Journalism student, the Criminology student, the Science student and the Nutrition student. I have this thirst for knowledge that just doesn't seem to go away. Sure some might look at me and think I am just very restless, unsettled and never want to work but I definitely don't see it that way. For a while I believed the negative voices around me. I regretted trying so many different things and wished that I just kept to my lane so to speak. I now choose not to agree. 

 

When I reflect as far back to when I was 13 I really am just someone that feels comfortable doing lots of different things. In fact, when I was in year 8 I got the award in my class as the best "all-rounder."

 

I know in my heart that I am definitely in the career field I am meant to be in. Preventative nutrition and wellness throughout life really is my passion and I am so proud of that. I am glad that I didn't settle into the camp I thought I needed to in order to conform or stay on the “set path.”  

 

When I was in year 12, the theme we had to study in English was "identity and belonging." It explored that as much as we are all individuals, we still a strive to belong. As people we desire the love, comfort and support of those around us. I think this might explain why so many of us go through phases of not accepting ourselves. We so desperately crave the acceptance of others that if we have to compromise parts of ourselves we don't seem to mind. With the benefit of hindsight now, I see that true belonging is the ability to be yourself within a group of others. You belong because you are you. You belong because you share some characteristics but are not afraid to express those that are different. I see this now in my relationship with Bruno.

 

I strived a bit too hard for perfectionism at the start of our relationship. I thought I had to be a particular way in order for him to really accept me. I know now that this is so far from the truth. The beauty of our relationship lies in our differences. Our ability to share our different thoughts and hobbies with the other. I can’t imagine what it would be like to be with someone who was exactly the same as me. It wouldn’t work. To me, I genuinely think that having differences and having things that make us unique allows us to have open ears and an open heart to opinions and ideas that are different from our own. It helps us to grow as individuals and as a community.

 

Now I am sure by now you are getting sick of just hearing about me. This is why I am going to use my blog as a forum for me to showcase the uniqueness of others and how it has shaped them. I have spoken to some really incredible people in my circle and am so thrilled that they have agreed to be part of this journey with me.

 

Thank you so much for all the positive feedback on this new direction I am taking. I really do think this is something that is going to resonate with a lot of people and help them to truly appreciate and love their unique selves.

 

Dance rehearsal in 2011

 

Law Graduate in 2018 

 

Foodie and Nutrition Student in 2019

 

 

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